BATSHITCRAZY, VA (IWR News Satire) -
On the third year anniversary of the Iraq war, the megalomaniac
founder of the Washington Times Reverend Sun Myung Moon launched his
new "Preemptive Warrior" magazine to help boost the sagging morale
(and ever decreasing numbers) of "Bush Doctrine" supporters.
we haven't killed or tortured nearly enough people yet.
If the President would just take my advice, we would just eliminate
87% of the Iraqi population, who want us to leave!
A couple of well placed tactical nuclear weapon detonations would
bring this insurgency nonsense to a halt, just like it did in Japan in
It would also sober up those damn Syrians and Iranians.
Either you give us the goddamn oil, or we nuke your ass!
That's the real Bush Doctrine message, isn't it?
If you will please excuse me now, I have to hold a mass divorce for
that thousand couples I forced to marry last year," said Reverend