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BUG TUSSLE, WV (IWR Parody News) - On the
campaign trail in the swing state of West Virginia, Homeland Security
Secretary Tom Ridge admitted to reporters that he had indeed forgotten
to issue an orange alert for the 4th of July. "I've been so busy
with this year's annual Department Homeland Security's Summer
picnic that I completely forgot to issue an alert. Ashcroft put
you up to this didn't he? I mean, like
nothing ever happens when I issue these dumb alerts anyway," said
Ridge while he thumbed through the Wall Street Journal help wanted
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